Happy Autumn

I always loved this time of year in New York. The season has a cooler, crisper feeling here in Texas, as well. Today is the Autumnal Equinox and Mabon! I’m not a Wiccan or any other religion, but I’ve always been drawn to earth religions. Pagans have more fun!

The visceral connection for Pagans has always been to celebrate and honor the body and its many desires. The seasons and the way we had to respect the earth’s cycle flowed into our own. Sex and Her gift of its bounty is something that came late in life to me—but nonetheless carries an intense response in me now.

Fall feels refreshing and new this year. I am with Him now. The gratitude I feel had me on my knees in front of Him this morning. Feeling Him cum down my throat…here in the flesh…so important to take pause to recognize, reflect, and celebrate all of it.

We haven’t had an easy time of things. Moving and ups and downs and some anxieties in both of us. But, this is us. This has always been us. Two Aries that need the fire for purification, as much as for vitality. We need the contrast. The extremes.

One year ago this time, I sat in an apartment in Arizona. A thousand miles away from Him. I could only dream of His touch and scent and love. He is here now. We are together. Nothing on this planet means more to me than this.

I sometimes joke with Him that this is just the Matrix. That nothing is real. Perhaps it is or perhaps it is not. Does it matter? It is all I know. It is all we have. So what we feel and think and breathe and dream is our truth. That is our life.

So on this day of equilibrium, this moment between summer and winter, this place between where life has been and where it is going…a moment to look deeply at where we are now. Of what it took to get here. Of how deep our well of love.

Everything good and amazing has always cum from this well. It’s the place where both He and I meet and touch. It’s our physical sex and what that has always done to our minds and hearts. It’s honoring that wet, slippery, scented heat and fire that is us.

As I walk outside today, I thank Her for the bounty of our love. Of the truth and intensity it brought to each of us. The transformation and power it has to bring us the biggest dream of our lives. I love you, Mr. Bobby, and I’m so grateful for you. I’m grateful for this life and for wherever it leads with you. Always with you.

Corporal Punishment

I’m at the pool again! And as I’m writing those words, there’s both this guilty pleasure and self consciousness that feels the need to be doing something. Ah, fuck it. I work hard—playing hard now, with a huge drink made of water, a splash of lemonade, frozen blueberries AND Crown Royal!

Cum to think of it, He exhaled a hit of weed passed my lips when waking this morning. This day off has been brought to you by Wake and Bake. Not my norm for sure…and there’s the self consciousness throwing itself on its belly.

Before quietly cumming up to Him to give Him a morning kiss at His trading station (now all set up and full of screens and activity), I had read a few posts from other bloggers: Naughty Nora, Succulent Savage, were writing about punishment. It’s something I’m new to…physically, I should say.

Punishment, before we met, had always been mental/emotional. And, there were two kinds: good punishment (for being a naughty slut) and bad punishment (for being a careless, disrespectful slut). They had distinctly different flavors. These days, with the physical connection we now live, it’s a mixed bag.

There’s poking and teasing and reprimanding, both visceral and psychological; and then there’s corporal punishment. Yesterday, I balked the psychological poking, with a “why are you poking at me”, said in a lil tone. About fifteen minutes later, His hand was around my throat choking me while He threw my legs above my ears, fucking me and mimicked me, saying just those words back to me. His cum dripping down my thighs and His marks left on my tits was an all day reminder of my place. A position that felt firm, controlled…calming.

My response to His pain is always a bit shocked, a bit emotionally hurt, and a denial of consequences. And then…there’s wetness and craving and admitting that it’s exactly what I need. In fact! I always wind up wanting more!

I can hear Him saying, “shocking”. We’re funny beings, don’t you think? We fear, and fret, and deny, only to betray ourselves. Exhale.

This drink is definitely making this pool visit relaxing. Something that I must need. Fuck—I think we all need these days! WTF is happening to this world is honestly beyond me. All there is to do is live within this different circumference. And, I guess as long as I don’t mind…it don’t matter.

A flash of Arizona slips in. Arizona, being alone, feeling uncertain, craving His…everything; these surreal moments, and they are many, of touching Him, kissing Him, I appreciate every moment. Every moment of His presence is a gift. It’s a miracle.

Dizzying Orgasmic Life With Him

I’m lying by the pool at our apartment complex and writing this on my phone. I was just writing about the way life changed abruptly and brought us back “home”—we seem to have a couple. Then I started writing about this wild moment of buying a tv last night and meeting a couple, whom He immediately knew were doing the same on the way in, plus got to take the tv back to our apartment for us! One of those serendipitous moments that amazed me. Not only His abilities to pick up on things but how it all went so seamlessly well!

I’m a bit scattered still, though, cause forming sentences right now is not effortless. I’m feeling my mind jump all over, especially to last night when we got into bed. There’s this part of me that is truly searching with Him. I know He knows this; He feels it. We never have had much of a spoken “rules” kind of D/s. It’s a life. It flows and changes. I’m always learning and struggle is nothing new. In fact, it’s part of who we are together. Just the same as before we were together physically.

This feeling of wanting to completely let go of control, and then vacillating between fighting it and completely going limp, has always been there. It is also the tension that made me cum so intensely last night. And I mean intensely and over and over!!

I smoked a deep hit of weed with Him and felt myself getting sleepy. I’m not even sure what happened, but next I felt Him grabbing me and flipping me over, raising my hips in the air. Oh wait…He was tickling me first! Fuck!! it was this intense toying with me. Tickling that spot where your hip meets your leg. I couldn’t control myself. He was teasing me. I literally felt my legs shake when He even pointed at them.

I laughed uncontrollably and then He switched to touch. Not sure how, but I was calm suddenly…and then panting and wet when He touched me there. Then stoking my cunt. It was so fucking crazy! I could feel my body begging for His fingers to fuck me, and when He did, I moaned out loud.

Then my ass thrust in the air and Him behind me. My hand guiding His cock inside me and His deep voice saying that it was breeding bitch position. Holy FUCK!! I just came and came and came and fucking came!! I don’t remember it stopping until after He came deep inside me and His cum was dripping all over me.

When He told me to go get Him some of the Key Lime Pie we had just shopped together for (yes, shopping with Him is still a huge, surreal moment to me), I rushed to bring it to Him, feeling His tone was a command. I was smiling ear to ear and still buzzing and in a daze from cumming so hard!

I’m grateful and in love and very, very happy. His words, “Lol, you don’t need to understand you just needed to be ok with not knowing and it always being better”, stay with me. It’s life with Him. Dizzying, orgasmic life with Him!

Each day another piece of the puzzle, another pixel of the photo

But it’s real, You are real. There in front of me…

I started writing that the other day and stopped. My mind and body and emotions have been scattered, to put it lightly. I slammed my finger in my car door the other day; sprained my toe on a moving box at our apartment; my left elbow hurts like a mother fucker (tennis elbow anyone?); and a friend’s dog scratched the fuck out of my left leg by jumping up with sharp nails! This isn’t abuse to get turned on by…it’s life and me not working together so smoothly!

I sat on His lap last night and begged for real abuse. The chaotic nature of our life right now, along with still getting to know each other needed His kind of mind hack. His control and creativity.

He took me upstairs and chose a bikini top and denim cut off skirt for me to put on. I walked behind Him down the steps and could feel my bare pussy rubbing against itself. He was quiet while I cleaned the dishes from dinner.

He was sitting outside by the pool, and when I came outside, He handed me the corncob pipe of weed. I took a deep toke and leaned into His mouth and kissed Him and exhaled while He drew in my breath. I just love when we share our breath that way; so intimate.

“Go inside and bring me out olive oil”, He said. I was calm and pretty high from the three hits by now; I tried to imagine what He might be using that for. Being high had the added benefit of just total release—to life and Him.

“Now let’s put some oil in your hands so you can give me a nice slow hand job”, He said in this soothing voice. Oh my fucking God, feeling His cock get stiff and thick, sliding under my fingers and hand. I was moaning out loud and just dripping.

He guided me to get up, and slowly sit down on His cock from behind. I yelled out loud when I slid down onto Him. His hand grabbed my pony tail, and He told me to arch my back while I bounced up and down.

I came on His cock, waking the neighbors, and then felt His body getting closer with each move of my hip. He grabbed my hips and pushed me down deeper into Him. He asked me if I knew why His cock was so hard inside me. “Because you’re my hot. Little. Slut”. He made me repeat it while He twisted my nipples hard.

The sound of His deep grunt when He came inside me—fuck, I adore Him. He told me to clean up my cum off of His cock, and I felt His cock get hard again in my mouth. When He came again down my throat, I literally didn’t even care if I took another breath in. I’d rather pass out being used by Him.

The surreal nature of our life, it’s what I meant by those lines about the picture becoming clearer the other day. I still look at Him and figure I’m dreaming. That we are together. That I can touch Him. That He can be so incredibly kind and caring, too, is a part of His dominance that is so completely disarming. Not that I have anything to feel defensive about with Him, it’s just more intense than I ever imagined. The extremes have always been with us and part of us. The extremes of Him and life. Amazing.

Magic Ride

Woke this morning and checked the stats on here, and saw 64 views yesterday! Wow! At this point, I pretty much write this for some kind of history of us. Of a way to keep what happened between us written down. It’s so surreal at times that writing becomes grounding.

Funny that I felt a twinge of nerves over “being discovered”. My ex stalking me still lingers, I guess. I had to remind myself that He is the only one I need permission from for things now—and He loves me on display!

Speaking of ex’s, He’s not been sleeping with me the last few nights so He can watch His ex at her house; a house we’re moving back into soon. She’s having a hard time, and we’re both doing our part to be there for her. Our life together has been…well, like I said, surreal.

Who says surreal needs to be bad, though? I like feeling like we’re in a dream; this magic carpet ride that is leading us on a journey together. Each time we settle into something, we know one thing for sure—it’s gonna change!!

Besides, it’s with Him. To have my arms wrapped around His neck, looking up and kissing Him is all I need. World crazies, whether personal or at large, they all fade away in His arms. We have each other’s back in all the ways needed. We watch out for each other and care for each other.

We realized yesterday that life has begun.

What I mean, is that sometimes because life has so many changes, the biggest change becomes obscured. We’re together now. There is no more waiting for someday when we meet each other, or when we can finally be together; this is our life!

We both laughed realizing that when talking last night. And I think what it’s teaching us, more than anything else, is that there is no settling into some kind of normal for us. Never has been before.

Our life is an adventure! One I wouldn’t choose to ride with anyone else on the planet! Cum to think of it…it’s more of a magick motorcycle ride!! That’s more His style. So, I’ll climb on the back and hold on tight. To us.

Sexbot Anniversary Party

What?! I know that sounds random. Last night, I (mostly…He cooked the steaks) cooked Him dinner to celebrate His 4th Anniversary of a brain surgery that saved His life. The outfit worn was one He wanted me to wear to His homecoming at our apartment. Since we were still house sitting, the sexbot outfit became a fitting accoutrement to the party.

Originally, the outfit was a pinup outfit. A pinup hotwife! My imagination brought to the next level robot version of a pinup hotwife. Pinup hotwife sexbot!

So, with latex stockings and garter, polka dot dress, pinup hair, and freaky turquoise contacts, the look was complete. When I walked to His office door and asked Him if He was ready for me to escort Him to the dining area, His expression when He saw the look was awesome! I do love surprising Him!!

Oh…and, almost forgot the panties I had printed that say “Property of Master”! He liked them very much and ran His finger across my lips when I showed Him. Mmmm. It was a good night

We laughed and danced; although, my couple dancing skills are sorely lacking. We ate a delicious meal and enjoyed being together.

This morning when I went in for my morning dose of His cum down my throat, He lifted me up from my knees, had me turn around, and guided me to slide down on His cock. The Property of Master panties are wet with His cum and will remain on all day, by His order. Mmmm. It’s been a great morning, too.

Life Moving Forward

I was just looking back at old pictures. So many sent to Him over the years. Every one an expression of released sex. Sex He released for me…from me. Sometimes, He ripped it out, and other times just coaxed out.

Our life together now is just as powerful, only I need to take a step back, I can see…so I can see. See what it took to be here with Him. How much has changed and how much is just the same.

I drove back to the house we’ve been staying at yesterday with Pink Floyd’s, “Take It Back” turned up loud. It was dizzying how I had played that from Him in NY. Then it was played all the way across the country to Arizona. And here it was with scenery that was surreal. Just surreal.

Today is the anniversary of His operation, which saved His life four years ago. Dressed in a bikini top He just recently cut the lining out of, a cut off denim mini skirt, and a pair of wedge heels, He waved me over to His desk while He fingered my pussy…already dripping for Him.

Down on my knees to suck His cock and swallow His morning cum. More surreal moments with Him. It’s life moving forward. It never stops.

I’m very grateful that life brought us together. That He is alive to be here to love. I love Him very much. I love Him as my Owner and as a Man. I hope that I make Him happy and that He feels loved. That’s all that really matters.

Some Feelings

I know the physical connection between us is locked in now: being away from Him leaves me with this insatiable lust for more. His scent. The taste of His mouth. The feel of His skin against mine.

Our lives as well as our bodies have become one. It feels as if I’m missing part of me when I go to work. nothing wrong with that—I’m in love with Him. I would do anything for Him, and I just love expressing it to Him.

We are Dom/sub foremost; lovers and friends, too. Guess that just needed to cum out on my way home to Him.

Crypto Cunt

New place to live, new life, new ways to be; so much new that sometimes looking back helps ground. Looking back at Fetlife and seeing photos posted to show Him. It was always for His attention and love. It always will be.

Grey hair replacing the now very faded red. I see submissives on Fet, many of them redheads. I do miss it, but embrace the shining silver. It has a haunting look that surprises me when I see my reflection.

Just a quick hello. About to go downstairs and bring Master some coffee. Offer my mouth from under His desk while He trades. Makes me smile to feel my small offerings brighten His day.

Welcome To Texas

Feels like being in a movie, lately; like a movie someone told me about and I’m finally getting to see it. Only…I’m in the movie with Him!! The scene this morning was His slut cumming down in a bikini top and a denim cut off skirt into His office…no panties, of course. And when His finger’s discovered that sliding up under it, He said “someone forgot panties, or better yet remembered none”.

His hand on my head pushing me down under His desk to wait for His cock being pulled out of His shorts. I swallowed and sucked until He pulled me up to straddle His chair and slid His cock inside. I looked right in His eyes while grinding and bouncing. The back of His brush paddled each nipple.

Fuck…to see the look in His eyes while He came inside His slut—I’m still in a daze. Before leaving His office He told me to bend over and He paddled my ass on each cheek. I love the marks and keep looking in the mirror to check them, like some silly school girl with a hickey, giggling with each glance.

I’m writing this, still feeling all wet and sticky with His cum on my cunt and thighs. With so much happening so fast, it’s hard to catch a breath or feel my feet on the ground. I’m so in love with Him.

So much happened so fast between us. Like a song that becomes an overnight sensation, yet took a lifetime to write. Our story is so much like that. It’s a story that keeps moving and changing with plot twists and turns neither of us could have imagined.

When He said, “Welcome to Texas” to me this morning, He laughingly explained how Texas takes you in slowly but surely. The outfit, the sweat on my skin from the heat, looking around at Him and where I am. In His arms kissing Him and serving Him with all my body, heart and soul, is all part of this magical space.

I had asked like a child looking up to the heavens for moments like this morning. I had cried that I longed for Him for so long, and here I am. Here we are. Forgive me if I kiss the sky and the ground and Him so much I’m giddy.

Maybe it takes writing it down to ground it inside me. To realize that whatever was before this…is a different life. For both of us. Texas, being together, wherever and whatever it leads to, I know it’s where I belong. It’s like letting go and holding on at the same time! Like He said, “well, make sure you strap in…cause, it’s gonna be one hell of a ride.”